5 easy steps: How to speak effectively
February 3, 2012 by Rita Marshall
image by CarbonNYC
Writing can be an intimidating skill to learn, but at least you can go back and edit your words if they’re not right. Anyone who’s ever put a foot in his or her mouth (that would be all of us) knows that speaking can be an even bigger minefield.
Here are five easy steps to help you speak more effectively in person.
1. Don’t Be Afraid of Silence
Cops and reporters know one surefire method of making someone spill their guts — being quiet. Most people feel so awkward during silences in a conversation that they’ll start rambling and blurting things out. If you have something to say, say it. If you aren’t sure if you should say something (even something as innocent and rambling as “ah, anyways, so I guess…”) give yourself three seconds to think about it.
2. Ask Positive
One job I had at a major daily newspaper consisted mostly of wheedling information out of sources. The number one rule was “never ask negative”. Ask, “You couldn’t do X, could you?” and the answer will likely be “no”. Ask “Could you please do X?” and your likelihood of “yes” is much higher.
3. Speak Positive
In the same way, say what is possible, not the many things that aren’t. “I can meet you Wednesday”, not “I can’t meet you on Monday, Tuesday or Thursday. How about Wednesday?” Starting with the negative can lead to rambling and confusion. What day were we supposed to meet again?
4. Be Wise with Your “Sorries”
As a Canadian, I love saying “I’m sorry” — it’s what I usually say when someone steps on my feet. But it can make you sound like you’re always doing something wrong and it leads to rambling. Use it wisely and genuinely.
5. Escape the Valley of the Raised Inflection
If it’s a statement, don’t say it like you’re asking a question. Because when you do? You sound like this? And unfortunately, many of us have this problem now?
The usual advice to rid yourself of a raised inflection is to constantly correct yourself until the habit is broken. I battle my raised inflection by taking a breath in the middle of a sentence. Not sure why this works, but it does.
(My “Canadian raise” however, remains. I have nothing further to add aboot that.) What are your best ideas on speaking face to face?
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Blackberry PIN use has city administration on hot seat
January 28, 2012 by Rita Marshall
image by arrayexception
Here’s one for the “Is Office Email Dead?” file.
The Ottawa Citizen recently discovered that senior city staff are using Blackberry PIN messages to communicate with each other instead of email. The city has a policy on “responsible computing”, the Citizen reports:
“The rules warn that outside email systems, like Gmail or Hotmail, aren’t allowed because they’re not secure, and also that employees’ superiors have the right to monitor their email. PINs aren’t covered.
The rules also say that electronic messages of all kinds can be important records that the city is obliged to keep, to document how decisions are made and to answer access-to-information requests.”
In response, city officials said that PINs are used mainly to communicate quickly with each other — something not always possible when each staffer is deluged with emails on a regular basis. They also point out that if they wanted to do something top secret that wouldn’t be documented by emails, they could’ve just phoned each other up or met in person.
Read more here.
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There’s only one tip on body language and business
January 24, 2012 by Rita Marshall
image by Banjo Brown
Globe and Mail commenters recently savaged “Ten simple and powerful body language tips for 2012“, originally a Forbes.com article.
The article’s suggestions included:
- hold “high- power” poses (such as feet up on a desk with your hands behind your head or standing with arms and legs spread apart) to stimulate testosterone and confidence.
- “to increase participation, look like you’re listening” That’s a direct quote.
- Smile genuinely. (with a detailed description of what a genuine smile looks like, so you can practice being genuine in the mirror, I guess.)
Commenters had a field day giving their own suggestions in response to an article that focused on poses instead of attitude.
“Good lord, that’s terrible advice,” wrote one commenter about the feet-on-desk power pose. “Unless you’re the CEO, don’t do this.”
“Agee 100%,” replied another. “When I walk in on somebody in that pose, I assume that they don’t have enough to do.”
“Holding your arms out and spreading your legs wide to make yourself appear as large as possible is also an effective tactic for warding off an attack by a bear,” observed one commenter. “You should note, however, that sometimes this technique just serves to pi$$ the bear off and it takes a bite out of your a$$.”
In comparison, Todd Smith’s explanation of body language on his blog Little Things Matter observes that body language is a reflection of our thoughts and feelings.
To make an actual difference in what your body communicates to others, you need to be aware and in control of your mental state. The only worthwhile tip for positive body language is to be in a positive state of mind.
“Forget the gold painted plaster and get at the source,” said one of Smith’s commenters, echoing the Globe and Mail readers who argued that being sincere is better than taking a “sincere” pose.
Can you tell when someone is faking body language? Does it irritate you? Or does it make you feel sympathetic to someone who just may be shy or nervous?
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SOPA, PIPA and the Battle of the Corporations
January 18, 2012 by Rita Marshall
photo credit: ikrichter
The fight over SOPA/PIPA is an epic battle between freedom-loving, open-source netizens and the giant, evil corporations who want to crush all that is good.
Right, right?
Not really.
I am not a supporter of SOPA and PIPA. Like most opponents of the bills, I do agree with fighting online piracy, and I feel that the current DMCA is pretty reasonable. (The mere mention of it has certainly been enough to deal with the ding-dongs who have stolen my content over the years.)
But this is not (simply) a case of power being put “in the hands of corporations” and only your Facebook status update can stop it. Yes, many of the opponents of SOPA and PIPA are plain home-spun Internet folk like you and me. But you know what? The US government doesn’t give a crap about us and our love of YouTube.
They care about YouTube itself, which is part of a corporation. They care about the signatories on a Nov. 2011 letter sent to the US Congress — AOL, eBay, Facebook, Google, LinkedIn, Yahoo, Twitter, Mozilla. These zillion-dollar corporations made their point that SOPA/PIPA will damage an important part of the economy. Now they’re also showing that they have remarkable influence over people (ahem, voters) by encouraging online users to speak out against the bills.
“Corporation” is not shorthand for “evil, greedy pigs”. A corporation is simply a large entity with a lot of weight (and money) to throw around — sometimes for better, sometimes for worse. NBCUniversal and Viacom (among others) have thrown their weight around, but are now challenged by the new digital corporate titans who have their own interests to protect.
To me, “corporate dinosaurs facing younger, powerful corporate newcomers” is the real story behind the clash over SOPA/PIPA. “Soulless business-suits vs. ragtag digital warriors” does sound better, but it’s not the truth.
It would make a hell of a Viacom pic, though.
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3 Reasons Why Business Jargon Might Be Necessary
January 17, 2012 by Rita Marshall
When writing about Careerbuilder’s 17 Most Odious Buzzwords, I realized that there were a few that I didn’t mind at all. I thought “next steps” was pretty simple, “elevator pitch” rather poetic and “proactive” is one of those words which is too commonly used to be banished.
In fact, there are several reasons why jargon might stick around:
1. Sometimes jargon saves time
Dan Roddy of Learning Rocks describes a school AGM he attended where an official apologized for all the educational jargon, which Roddy thought completely justified. “Had the Head to speak all the acronyms out in full and explain every last word to us newbies we would not have covered as much ground,” he explains in his post “In Defence of Jargon”.
Having covered school board meetings, I understand completely. The many programs which fund schools, guide curriculum and measure students’ progress are complicated enough. Having a shorthand for them speeds up time if everyone knows what it means.
2. Jargon can be code words to enter a certain club
Jargon can foster a team environment, whether in one company or in an entire industry. You see it in the military, among police officers, among techies, among restaurant workers. Why should business professionals be any different?
When jargon functions as a “code word”, it lets someone know that you have (some) knowledge of their field. When I interview someone in a field I am comfortable with (like health care) I will introduce an acronym as soon as it is practical to do so. This lets my source know that they don’t need to explain basic terms and concepts to me. It builds rapport and speeds things up.
3. Jargon sometimes becomes accepted usage
In the 1982 tween novel Macdonald Hall: The War with Mr. Wizzle, a killjoy new teacher tries to ruin the vibrant life at a boys’ school by bringing in a big computer. The students are especially indignant over his use of the term “input”, which none of them have ever heard.
Twenty years later the popular Canadian novel underwent a major rewrite, given that the idea of computers being unknown and boring hadn’t aged well. I’m guessing they also took out the section where kids needed the term “input” explained to them.
To our eternal delight and distress, the English language welcomes almost any word which wins a popularity contest among its speakers. Sometimes, jargon makes that leap.
In the 1949 AP article “Business Jargon of Today Can Get to Be Confusing”, a business reporter assures readers that a new economic dictionary will precisely explain the terms inflation, deflation, hidden inflation and scab. It also outlines a concept called “psychic income”. In the 21st century we call that “job satistfaction”. So take hope that sometimes new jargon is easier to understand than the old, and occasionally things become clearer with time.
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